I re-read all of your Blog's posts.
And all I do is.. reading, and remembering, and memorizing.
Also deleting. all the comment I've made at my worst time.
I wish you a happy ending story. And I wish you wish me too.
Tampilkan postingan dengan label agak penting. Tampilkan semua postingan
Tampilkan postingan dengan label agak penting. Tampilkan semua postingan
Selasa, 06 September 2016
Senin, 30 November 2015
distance.
At first, i thought that i could survive this situation, and you are the one who couldn't.
It's been just one day. And now i know, i was wrong.
I am the only one who can't survive. I need you 24/7. I need you to bother me while i'm doing something. I need you to chat me about every single thing in every single time. I need you to focus on me only. I need you there while i'm awake from my sleep. I need you there when i'm visiting the doctor. I miss you, you know. I miss you until it hurts me so.
What are you doing there? I thought that you wouldn't be this busy. But, once again, baby, i was wrong. You're so busy until i feel so lonely.
I know you're trying to reach me by phone in every single chance you had, but that's not enough for me. I know that was totally wrong, i'm such an egoist, childish, stupid. I have nothing to do here, i'll be the only one who will feel more lonely. But that's just too easy to make you confuse if I tell you this, so..
You know, i'm trying..
I have tried to post this 3 times, and always failed. Is that a sign for me to never post this? Hm?
It's been just one day. And now i know, i was wrong.
I am the only one who can't survive. I need you 24/7. I need you to bother me while i'm doing something. I need you to chat me about every single thing in every single time. I need you to focus on me only. I need you there while i'm awake from my sleep. I need you there when i'm visiting the doctor. I miss you, you know. I miss you until it hurts me so.
What are you doing there? I thought that you wouldn't be this busy. But, once again, baby, i was wrong. You're so busy until i feel so lonely.
I know you're trying to reach me by phone in every single chance you had, but that's not enough for me. I know that was totally wrong, i'm such an egoist, childish, stupid. I have nothing to do here, i'll be the only one who will feel more lonely. But that's just too easy to make you confuse if I tell you this, so..
You know, i'm trying..
I have tried to post this 3 times, and always failed. Is that a sign for me to never post this? Hm?
Kamis, 01 Oktober 2015
God bless my vertebrae, please.
Diagnosa dokter sih Scoliosis Thoracolumbal. Parah, yes? Hmm.
Kata dokter, ini kongenital. Iya, bawaan lahir. Ayah syok sekali pas tau ini bawaan lahir. Aku cuma diem karena awalnya ga percaya juga ini bawaan lahir. Ga mungkin. Ini idiopatik, aku yakin.
Kata dokter, brace ga berguna lagi. Brace cuma buat penderita skoliosis dibawah 17 tahun. Aku sudah tau itu, cuma karena dokter sangat menegaskan kalau ini ga berguna lagi, aku down.
Tapi sudahlah.
Sudah terdiagnosa. Sudah terjadi. Ini skoliosis pada thorax yg sampe setinggi TH 10. Sebagaimana kita tau bahwa tulang vertebrae thoracalis itu ada 12. You know what that means, right.
Mulai besok aku bakal fisioterapi, tiga kali seminggu. Waw. Such a wow. Tiga kali seminggu seems so scare.
Wish me tons of luck ya guys.
I know no one will read this posting, but i don't know. I'm just...trying.
Kata dokter, ini kongenital. Iya, bawaan lahir. Ayah syok sekali pas tau ini bawaan lahir. Aku cuma diem karena awalnya ga percaya juga ini bawaan lahir. Ga mungkin. Ini idiopatik, aku yakin.
Kata dokter, brace ga berguna lagi. Brace cuma buat penderita skoliosis dibawah 17 tahun. Aku sudah tau itu, cuma karena dokter sangat menegaskan kalau ini ga berguna lagi, aku down.
Tapi sudahlah.
Sudah terdiagnosa. Sudah terjadi. Ini skoliosis pada thorax yg sampe setinggi TH 10. Sebagaimana kita tau bahwa tulang vertebrae thoracalis itu ada 12. You know what that means, right.
Mulai besok aku bakal fisioterapi, tiga kali seminggu. Waw. Such a wow. Tiga kali seminggu seems so scare.
Wish me tons of luck ya guys.
I know no one will read this posting, but i don't know. I'm just...trying.
Kamis, 01 Januari 2015
2015 start with a pain. For me.
This guy.
He told me he love me.
He asked me if I wanna be his girl.
Yes, I love him too.
He doesn't need my answer, he said that. But that's not fair, right? So I'm trying to understand the situation and condition. In this case, I'm afraid.
Then I give him the answer... "No, I can't.", I said to him.
Why do I still said "No" when actually I don't wanna lose him?
No, it's not a regret if u think so. I just want to share my sadness. So yeah, it's kinda weird because we both are no longer friend, and not yet a couple. Damn right.
K, u know I don't wanna lose u.
He told me he love me.
He asked me if I wanna be his girl.
Yes, I love him too.
He doesn't need my answer, he said that. But that's not fair, right? So I'm trying to understand the situation and condition. In this case, I'm afraid.
Then I give him the answer... "No, I can't.", I said to him.
Why do I still said "No" when actually I don't wanna lose him?
No, it's not a regret if u think so. I just want to share my sadness. So yeah, it's kinda weird because we both are no longer friend, and not yet a couple. Damn right.
K, u know I don't wanna lose u.
Sabtu, 04 Oktober 2014
dear, no one.
Oh oh, I got one conclusion.
Am still trapped on the same place, no matter how hard I try to let myself out. No matter how loud I cry for this. I'm still have nothing to hold on.
Your smile, it sinks me to the deep dark sea.
Dear no one.
Am still trapped on the same place, no matter how hard I try to let myself out. No matter how loud I cry for this. I'm still have nothing to hold on.
Your smile, it sinks me to the deep dark sea.
Dear no one.
Rabu, 24 September 2014
Psychiatric, Matswapati, Dahlan.
Halooooooooo!
Sedang dinas Keperawatan Jiwa di kota Bunga, Magelang.
So haaaaaapppyyy being here. Really out of my expectation about the patient. I swear to you, they are all really really really funny and know how to joke, how to make someone laugh. And their act, oh pleaseeeee, really innocent and like a child. That's what I saw in Wisma Matswapati.
What I saw on UPI? THAT WAS THE REAL PSYCHIATRIC HOSPITAL hahaha
I have met so many friends here.
The nurse, from Sulawesi Tengah, Medan, NTT, Ambon, omg... They are really awesome and friendly!
And the patient too...
They're really friendly. Pak Jarwo, Aziz, Slamet, Yusaeni, Lukman, Mandon, Sujiman. Aaaaaah they're the best ever!
And also, the boy I know from Restu. He's 20th years old. His name is Dahlan Rizkiono.
I've tried to search him on social media, and the result is.... BIG ZERO.
Thanks to Restu, she was really good had have tell me about him. With a media called.. sketch book.
Weird? Yes way at first.
Before Restu tell me about him, I dunno why, I want to bought a sketch book. Bcs this is a sketch book. And It's price is only for 15k. Yep, that's why I bought that.
Next day, Restu told me that Dahlan is a smart boy alive who can draw so so soooooooooo good. He used his hand at It's best. I know right? He's freaking awesome.
Day by day, I'm really curious to know him more and more. So I decided to let Restu took my sketch book and give it to him. Yes, he want that. I know he need that. He need a media for him to do something. How cool. For me.
With that kind of skill, he also have a really handsome face. He told me that his friends called him like an actor name's Teuku Wisnu from Indonesia. Lol. Hell yes, he's so funny! Even funnier when he act like a brother(for me), so protected. Lovely.
Now, the sketch book is so full of his hand-writing. I love to read all of his story. Sad. Sometimes funny. Sometimes flat.
And now, he's already home. His parents came here to take him out of this place. This psychiatric hospital. Sounds scary, right. But it's not like what's on your mind, I swear. I love being here :)
We keep on contact always, he always text me, and also call me through the phone. Even sometimes all he want to know is only what's up with Restu now. Ehehe. I'm kind of jealous with Restu, but it's okay. At least, Restu already ignore him. Lol
What kind of feeling is this, huh?
Oh well, did I write too much?
I'll upload the photo of his draws later on bcs now I don't have any internet connection except this phone. Huft.
You'll impress, I know.
Sedang dinas Keperawatan Jiwa di kota Bunga, Magelang.
So haaaaaapppyyy being here. Really out of my expectation about the patient. I swear to you, they are all really really really funny and know how to joke, how to make someone laugh. And their act, oh pleaseeeee, really innocent and like a child. That's what I saw in Wisma Matswapati.
What I saw on UPI? THAT WAS THE REAL PSYCHIATRIC HOSPITAL hahaha
I have met so many friends here.
The nurse, from Sulawesi Tengah, Medan, NTT, Ambon, omg... They are really awesome and friendly!
And the patient too...
They're really friendly. Pak Jarwo, Aziz, Slamet, Yusaeni, Lukman, Mandon, Sujiman. Aaaaaah they're the best ever!
And also, the boy I know from Restu. He's 20th years old. His name is Dahlan Rizkiono.
I've tried to search him on social media, and the result is.... BIG ZERO.
Thanks to Restu, she was really good had have tell me about him. With a media called.. sketch book.
Weird? Yes way at first.
Before Restu tell me about him, I dunno why, I want to bought a sketch book. Bcs this is a sketch book. And It's price is only for 15k. Yep, that's why I bought that.
Next day, Restu told me that Dahlan is a smart boy alive who can draw so so soooooooooo good. He used his hand at It's best. I know right? He's freaking awesome.
Day by day, I'm really curious to know him more and more. So I decided to let Restu took my sketch book and give it to him. Yes, he want that. I know he need that. He need a media for him to do something. How cool. For me.
With that kind of skill, he also have a really handsome face. He told me that his friends called him like an actor name's Teuku Wisnu from Indonesia. Lol. Hell yes, he's so funny! Even funnier when he act like a brother(for me), so protected. Lovely.
Now, the sketch book is so full of his hand-writing. I love to read all of his story. Sad. Sometimes funny. Sometimes flat.
And now, he's already home. His parents came here to take him out of this place. This psychiatric hospital. Sounds scary, right. But it's not like what's on your mind, I swear. I love being here :)
We keep on contact always, he always text me, and also call me through the phone. Even sometimes all he want to know is only what's up with Restu now. Ehehe. I'm kind of jealous with Restu, but it's okay. At least, Restu already ignore him. Lol
What kind of feeling is this, huh?
Oh well, did I write too much?
I'll upload the photo of his draws later on bcs now I don't have any internet connection except this phone. Huft.
You'll impress, I know.
Selasa, 22 April 2014
this pain is already ended.
Entah, seharusnya gue harus update ini atau nggak. Yaudahlah, biar jelas aja ya..
Gue sama panji (akhirnya) putus.
Selama pacaran kurang lebih 162 hari atau 5 bulan 12 hari.. Termasuk didiamkan selama 8 hari sebelum putus.. Yah, that's the result.
Entahlah, males nyeritain gimana putus. Males itu ya karena dia bikinnya complicated. Mutar-balikin omongan. Nyalahin cuma ke satu pihak. Ah tai lah pokoknya.
Udah ya, males ngomong beginian.
Semoga panji bahagia, dan gue jauh lebih bahagia. Amin.
Thank God, for telling me that he's the worse for me, even I'm the best for him. Lol. Just kidding. No offense.
7 November 2013-19 April 2014.
What an unbelievable! That's a record, you know.
Gue sama panji (akhirnya) putus.
Selama pacaran kurang lebih 162 hari atau 5 bulan 12 hari.. Termasuk didiamkan selama 8 hari sebelum putus.. Yah, that's the result.
Entahlah, males nyeritain gimana putus. Males itu ya karena dia bikinnya complicated. Mutar-balikin omongan. Nyalahin cuma ke satu pihak. Ah tai lah pokoknya.
Udah ya, males ngomong beginian.
Semoga panji bahagia, dan gue jauh lebih bahagia. Amin.
Thank God, for telling me that he's the worse for me, even I'm the best for him. Lol. Just kidding. No offense.
7 November 2013-19 April 2014.
What an unbelievable! That's a record, you know.
Rabu, 16 April 2014
Long Distance Ribetship
Panji and I getting boring. We both feels it. Or is it only my feeling? Hmm..
Long Distance isn't only a distance now. It's contained distance, our feeling, and time.
Our feeling? Lost contact for 5 days. are you kidding me? You sure we both are still in a relationship? omg..
Time? You wake up every evening.. You active every midnight. I'm a morning person. I sleep at night. What a different life, right?
So why don't you try to end it up because you're the one who's started it up? I'm okay:)
Long Distance isn't only a distance now. It's contained distance, our feeling, and time.
Our feeling? Lost contact for 5 days. are you kidding me? You sure we both are still in a relationship? omg..
Time? You wake up every evening.. You active every midnight. I'm a morning person. I sleep at night. What a different life, right?
So why don't you try to end it up because you're the one who's started it up? I'm okay:)
Rabu, 26 Maret 2014
Senin, 03 Maret 2014
The Script talk about..
http://m.youtube.com/watch?rl=yes&v=YGcwtGjy_DE&client=mv-google&gl=ID&hl=en&guid=
What a concert!
What a concert!
Sabtu, 01 Maret 2014
what's the problem then?
Tomorrow is my birthday and Panji is still doubt if I really love him or no. Gosh..
How could this happen to me?
How could he doubt me just because I believe he won't cheat on me? It doesn't mean I'm not afraid to lose you ok. How could you think like that? Eeerrwwwhhh!
How could this happen to me?
How could he doubt me just because I believe he won't cheat on me? It doesn't mean I'm not afraid to lose you ok. How could you think like that? Eeerrwwwhhh!
Sabtu, 22 Februari 2014
ah gatau apa judulnya..
H min 8.
Wish-list gua udah sampe urutan ke berapa nih? Gua ga tau. Udah banyak bener -__-"
Padahal kalo dipikir-pikir, siapa yg mau ngasih? Gua baik sama orang aja jarang. Dan semua yg ada di wish-list yg gua punya.. Semuanya subhanallah, bener dah. Kinda impossible. But who knows, right?
Ga tau ini khayalan gua yg terlalu tinggi atau apaaa, gua ga ngerti juga -_- yaah, whatever it will be..
Big dream and small dream, both have the same price, right? So don't be afraid to dream. But remember, nightmare also a dream too ;))
Panji lagi manggung, gua streaming-an dulu yaw. See ya!
Wish-list gua udah sampe urutan ke berapa nih? Gua ga tau. Udah banyak bener -__-"
Padahal kalo dipikir-pikir, siapa yg mau ngasih? Gua baik sama orang aja jarang. Dan semua yg ada di wish-list yg gua punya.. Semuanya subhanallah, bener dah. Kinda impossible. But who knows, right?
Ga tau ini khayalan gua yg terlalu tinggi atau apaaa, gua ga ngerti juga -_- yaah, whatever it will be..
Big dream and small dream, both have the same price, right? So don't be afraid to dream. But remember, nightmare also a dream too ;))
Panji lagi manggung, gua streaming-an dulu yaw. See ya!
Selasa, 11 Februari 2014
this fucking morning...
I hate this morning. My blackberry service is already unavailable. But I'm still can browsing and sosial-media-ing. I open up some tab on my browsing app. It used too well, so I found something I shouldn't know. I know it just a memory for them, maybe. But Idk why, I hate to find that. I wish I didn't know who the hell is that girl, and really.. I wish I didn't this silly while stalking aaaaaaaaaa!
I mean, why should the same? Ok, we're not the same. But, she listens on the songs I listen to. Just that. But I hate it. I am jealousy. I shouldn't act this stupid. But whatever, I hate that girl and I hate him.
I ever said that I have to update my playlist as soon as Sonic, and yep, my phone's memory going worst, and it broke. Thank God, I have to makeover my playlist then.
But look what the worsest thing happen now.. She likes the song I used to love so muuuuuuuucccccchhhhhhhhhhh. They sing it together like a piece of shit. Aaaaaaa!
I need some new song nawww!
I mean, why should the same? Ok, we're not the same. But, she listens on the songs I listen to. Just that. But I hate it. I am jealousy. I shouldn't act this stupid. But whatever, I hate that girl and I hate him.
I ever said that I have to update my playlist as soon as Sonic, and yep, my phone's memory going worst, and it broke. Thank God, I have to makeover my playlist then.
But look what the worsest thing happen now.. She likes the song I used to love so muuuuuuuucccccchhhhhhhhhhh. They sing it together like a piece of shit. Aaaaaaa!
I need some new song nawww!
Senin, 06 Januari 2014
2014 is coming..
Bloggy!!!
It's already 2014 tho!
I can't believe this until I re-read my old posting about 2013.
read this if you cant believe it too.. this
see?
I really let my hair grow out without cut it even just a little. (success)
and the second things.. I have a boyfriend on 2013. yeeey! (success)
And if you think on that day I was just joking, then hell yes! my joke was success. everybody laugh! wohoooo~ I'm a great entertain!
so this is my resolution in 2014:
1.
me and my friends have a plan to go to Padang and back packer-ing. couldn't imagine how great it will be! yay, wish it become true. Amin.
2.
Hehehe I always love maroon hair :$ (this one is impossible actually)
It's already 2014 tho!
I can't believe this until I re-read my old posting about 2013.
read this if you cant believe it too.. this
see?
I really let my hair grow out without cut it even just a little. (success)
and the second things.. I have a boyfriend on 2013. yeeey! (success)
And if you think on that day I was just joking, then hell yes! my joke was success. everybody laugh! wohoooo~ I'm a great entertain!
so this is my resolution in 2014:
1.
me and my friends have a plan to go to Padang and back packer-ing. couldn't imagine how great it will be! yay, wish it become true. Amin.
2.
Hehehe I always love maroon hair :$ (this one is impossible actually)
Well, welcome 2014! I wish all of the things I wanna do could be trueeee :3
Happy Nu Yeaaaaah! \^^/
Senin, 09 Desember 2013
A little shit
Terlalu stres sama tugas praktik mata kuliah Promosi Kesehatan. Kita disuruh ngelaksanain penyuluhan di suatu tempat, terserah dimana, berdasarkan masalah kesehatan di tempat itu. omg!
okeeee, pencarian tempat sama masalah kesehatannya udah selesai. walaupun pembimbing nyuruh kita nyelesaiinnya dalam 10 hari, kita malah makan waktu 2 minggu. keren. capek. banget.
done with that.
another problem now.. buat proposal. shit.damn..
temen temen ga ada yg peduli, gue kerjain sampe malem. oke selesai. walau jelek, ga masalah..
Dateng lagi masalah lain.. si pembimbing ga acc tema sama proposal kita! padahal sebelumnya dia yg nentuin tema itu aaaaaaaaaaa-njingbnr T^T
okelah, pasti aku lagi ini yg disuurh buat proposalnyaaaaa, iya gapapa, beneran deh gapapa 3-|
sekarang lagi nyoba buat proposal baru nih, doain aja selesai. iya, doain selesai, masalah diterima atau ga, nantilah :')
peace out.
okeeee, pencarian tempat sama masalah kesehatannya udah selesai. walaupun pembimbing nyuruh kita nyelesaiinnya dalam 10 hari, kita malah makan waktu 2 minggu. keren. capek. banget.
done with that.
another problem now.. buat proposal. shit.damn..
temen temen ga ada yg peduli, gue kerjain sampe malem. oke selesai. walau jelek, ga masalah..
Dateng lagi masalah lain.. si pembimbing ga acc tema sama proposal kita! padahal sebelumnya dia yg nentuin tema itu aaaaaaaaaaa-njingbnr T^T
okelah, pasti aku lagi ini yg disuurh buat proposalnyaaaaa, iya gapapa, beneran deh gapapa 3-|
sekarang lagi nyoba buat proposal baru nih, doain aja selesai. iya, doain selesai, masalah diterima atau ga, nantilah :')
peace out.
Minggu, 10 November 2013
Seasons in my place~
This is such an absurd weather in my place.. in my place.. (coldplay-in my place)
sometimes, it feels like really hot out here, dry and too much polution iyuuuhhh
but sometimes, rain fall every single time, can't stop. or just won't stop.. idk. (miley cyrus-we can't stop)
don't know exactly what really happen in this place actually. just so you know that i am feeling an absurd weather these days.. thankyou Indonesia. Gue Fitri, sampe jumpa! (ala comic)
Minggu, 27 Oktober 2013
Me need you.
I've been thinking about that. Since the first time I feel you. Until.. I don't know when.
I hope time and world will make us becomes one. I don't wanna lose you.
Me need you.
I hope time and world will make us becomes one. I don't wanna lose you.
Me need you.
Kamis, 24 Oktober 2013
Rabu, 23 Oktober 2013
Long time no blogging, vist someone's blog, and.. you know :)
i miss you so damn till i can't breathe anymore!
boong ding :D
entahlah, gue lagi ga mood blogging karena... ga pantes diomongin ah. ntar dibilang lebay~
gue besok mau PKL blog, ke daerah OI, ga tau persisnya dimana. wish me luck ya..
padahal gue bukan murid yg pantes sih buat ngejalanin tugas berat inih, tapi yaudahlah, terima aja, gratis juga *eh
okay then, just so you know blog, you're still on my mind :)) i've sth to do, see ya!
i miss you so damn till i can't breathe anymore!
boong ding :D
entahlah, gue lagi ga mood blogging karena... ga pantes diomongin ah. ntar dibilang lebay~
gue besok mau PKL blog, ke daerah OI, ga tau persisnya dimana. wish me luck ya..
padahal gue bukan murid yg pantes sih buat ngejalanin tugas berat inih, tapi yaudahlah, terima aja, gratis juga *eh
okay then, just so you know blog, you're still on my mind :)) i've sth to do, see ya!
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