dear, no one.

Oh oh, I got one conclusion.
Am still trapped on the same place, no matter how hard I try to let myself out. No matter how loud I cry for this. I'm still have nothing to hold on.
Your smile, it sinks me to the deep dark sea.
Dear no one.

Psychiatric, Matswapati, Dahlan.

Halooooooooo!
Sedang dinas Keperawatan Jiwa di kota Bunga, Magelang.
So haaaaaapppyyy being here. Really out of my expectation about the patient. I swear to you, they are all really really really funny and know how to joke, how to make someone laugh. And their act, oh pleaseeeee, really innocent and like a child. That's what I saw in Wisma Matswapati.
What I saw on UPI? THAT WAS THE REAL PSYCHIATRIC HOSPITAL hahaha

I have met so many friends here.
The nurse, from Sulawesi Tengah, Medan, NTT, Ambon, omg... They are really awesome and friendly!
And the patient too...
They're really friendly. Pak Jarwo, Aziz, Slamet, Yusaeni, Lukman, Mandon, Sujiman. Aaaaaah they're the best ever!

And also, the boy I know from Restu. He's 20th years old. His name is Dahlan Rizkiono.
I've tried to search him on social media, and the result is.... BIG ZERO.
Thanks to Restu, she was really good had have tell me about him. With a media called.. sketch book.
Weird? Yes way at first.

Before Restu tell me about him, I dunno why, I want to bought a sketch book. Bcs this is a sketch book. And It's price is only for 15k. Yep, that's why I bought that.
Next day, Restu told me that Dahlan is a smart boy alive who can draw so so soooooooooo good. He used his hand at It's best. I know right? He's freaking awesome.
Day by day, I'm really curious to know him more and more. So I decided to let Restu took my sketch book and give it to him. Yes, he want that. I know he need that. He need a media for him to do something. How cool. For me.
With that kind of skill, he also have a really handsome face. He told me that his friends called him like an actor name's Teuku Wisnu from Indonesia. Lol. Hell yes, he's so funny! Even funnier when he act like a brother(for me), so protected. Lovely.
Now, the sketch book is so full of his hand-writing. I love to read all of his story. Sad. Sometimes funny. Sometimes flat.
And now, he's already home. His parents came here to take him out of this place. This psychiatric hospital. Sounds scary, right. But it's not like what's on your mind, I swear. I love being here :)
We keep on contact always, he always text me, and also call me through the phone. Even sometimes all he want to know is only what's up with Restu now. Ehehe. I'm kind of jealous with Restu, but it's okay. At least, Restu already ignore him. Lol
What kind of feeling is this, huh?

Oh well, did I write too much?
I'll upload the photo of his draws later on bcs now I don't have any internet connection except this phone. Huft.
You'll impress, I know.

pain. that's how I feel. sad? yes way.

What have I done, God?
Was it something wrong, God?
I ain't ready with this kind of condition.
I'm not say that I'm desperate. But it makes me feeling sooooooo uncomfortable, You know huuuu
Yes, You know that, God.
So pleasee, just take all this pain away. Away from my body, away from me T_T
(Rd. Badan gatel gatel semua, tiap hari udah mandi air hangat pake sabun bayi, eh masih aja gatel, bentol bentol merah sampe luka, terjadi udah sebulan lebih, haven't visit the doctor yet, huft)

INI GUA CURHAT SAMA SIAPA SIH?!
OH, NO ONE. WELL!
See ya, guys!

Anak futsal tuh gitu ya..
Keseringan mainin bola sih, hati cewe dikira bola juga sama dianya. Dimainin mulu.
Eeeeeeeeeh~

He's really out of my life.

this pain is already ended.

Entah, seharusnya gue harus update ini atau nggak. Yaudahlah, biar jelas aja ya..
Gue sama panji (akhirnya) putus.
Selama pacaran kurang lebih 162 hari atau 5 bulan 12 hari.. Termasuk didiamkan selama 8 hari sebelum putus.. Yah, that's the result.
Entahlah, males nyeritain gimana putus. Males itu ya karena dia bikinnya complicated. Mutar-balikin omongan. Nyalahin cuma ke satu pihak. Ah tai lah pokoknya.
Udah ya, males ngomong beginian.
Semoga panji bahagia, dan gue jauh lebih bahagia. Amin.
Thank God, for telling me that he's the worse for me, even I'm the best for him. Lol. Just kidding. No offense.
7 November 2013-19 April 2014.
What an unbelievable! That's a record, you know.

Long Distance Ribetship

Panji and I getting boring. We both feels it. Or is it only my feeling? Hmm..
Long Distance isn't only a distance now. It's contained distance, our feeling, and time.
Our feeling? Lost contact for 5 days. are you kidding me? You sure we both are still in a relationship? omg..
Time? You wake up every evening.. You active every midnight. I'm a morning person. I sleep at night. What a different life, right?
So why don't you try to end it up because you're the one who's started it up? I'm okay:)